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Santa needs to keep his ‘ho ho ho’

By J.D. Davidson
The Times-Journal

Published November 24, 2007

When did Don Imus and Santa become one in the same? Something’s going on here and it’s not jolly. Actually, it could make a Grinch raise in eyebrow or two or three or however many eyebrows a Grinch has.

Here’s something you’re going to have to see or hear or, ok, read to believe. But trust me, it’s all on the up-and-up – meaning it will make you throw up.

It all comes courtesy of Yahoo – that place were weird, wacky news goes to live. It seems somewhere in Australia, Santas have been told not to use the traditional “ho ho ho” greeting. Why? Those of you who minds that sometimes find their will in the gutter already get it. For the rest of you, well, to put it delicately, it seems the phrase “ho ho ho” is offensive to women.

Instead, Santa Clauses in Sydney have been told to say “ha ha ha” instead. And in the interest of full disclosure, the Santa recruitment firm says it’s up to each Santa to decide on a ho or a ha.

That same recruitment firm says ho can frighten children and it’s took close to another word we throw around here in the United States. Doesn’t “boo” scare children, not ho, and aren’t people smart enough to tell the difference between a laugh and a words. Well in Australia, Christmas comes in the summer, so that ought to tell a little about how much the know.

If you don’t have a headache now, then you’re missing something, because mine is splitting and I’m doing the writing, not the reading or the understanding.

Before you know it, Santa won’t be able to say he’s checking his list because it might children feel like a bookie. Or, he’ll have to knock before coming into your house as to not offend thieves.

“Ho Ho Ho” was Santa’s long before we decided to toss in the gutter. He had it first and gets to play with it as long as he wants.

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